What are terrible men that are romantically successful doing “right”?

I know this sounds awful, probably because it is, and the fact that I’m even asking is a red flag, so let’s say it’s a thought exercise.

You constantly see posts like “my boyfriend doesn’t wipe after he poops and puts cigarettes out in my eyes, is this my fault? I love him so much” and so on. What are these types of guys doing that makes them so desirable? Obviously I’m not trying to emulate it in any way, it’s just really baffling to me, especially as someone who can’t land a date. I’m not entitled to love because I don’t abuse women obviously, but shit, there must be at least one minute thing that they’re doing right and I’m doing wrong.