Fixing me

Is there any cure for Stockholm syndrome? How can I undo the deep sense of “love” and “protectiveness” I feel towards someone who doesn’t feel the same towards me? My love towards him is instinctual and is going on 5 years strong.

Given the duration, severity of the damage he has done to my life, and the stage of life I am in, I feel like the only way he could remediate this would be to become the ‘mask’ I fell for, so I can love and care for him forever. It’s impossible.

I’m heartbroken constantly and only reminiscing on past dreams of a family and future together gets me by. I know I am deluding myself with lies, which I do not want to do, but I cannot stop fawning over him. Life has us in a situation that is only reinforcing the trauma bond I have to him.

What do I need to do to recover and move on? I can’t picture my life without him. My identity feels tied to him because of the trauma bond; it is one-sided. We haven’t seen each other in person in almost a year.

What is wrong with me? Please help.

I loved the mask before the trauma bond was established. I feel helpless now.