Another person who can't fall asleep...

I've had the machine about 4 months now. I don't find it uncomfortable when I first put it on but I just don't fall asleep and then I'm lying there for ages and it does start to get annoying and I've been not forcing it too much as I didn't want to associate the machine with stress, so I turn it off if I haven't fallen asleep after an hour and a half or two hours.

...but the not-getting-stressed ship has sailed and now I feel panicked at the thought of using it every night or at the sight of it. Sometimes I end up in tears - pathetic, I know - which obviously makes it even harder to use the machine.

I've tried taking melatonin, magnesium supplements. I meditate twice a day which I hoped might help me relax enough but no. Does anyone have any tips or ideas?

I'm so disappointed. I was on a waiting list for a sleep study for nearly 7 years and I was so excited to finally get help.

I was assigned a Cpap nurse person when I got the machine and it was made to sound like she'd be calling me regularly to check up but she never did and when I've called her with a question she always talks about how busy she is and how many calls she's getting and I just feel really guilty. (I haven't phoned her excessively I don't think, three times in 4 months?) It's not her fault if she's been overburdened with clients but when I've spoken to her she's on her way into someone's house and I wonder why some people actually get her coming to the house to help them and I feel like an irritant if I even have a question.

The machine makes a wheezy whiny noise that creates a scream inside my mind. Is that normal? Could there be something wrong with the fan? On the plus side when I give up and turn the machine off the relief is incredible and I sleep better than I ever have in my life.

Sorry I am in a venting/whingeing mood- but I'm also very open to advice.