Am I overreacting? my friend chooses her bf over everyone & everything

i have this friend, i'll call her ES.

so tell me why ES is ALWAYS choosing her bum loser of a man over everyone and everything when he makes it clear he dont even like her. bro cheats on her and embarrasses her regularly, treats her like dookie and she would still choose him over her own daughter. when her daughter was first born he would talk about the baby like a thing and was always talking about how agitating and irritating her crying was and how he couldn't even stay home because of it. he would put his hands on my friends and constantly threaten her and belittle her. then she comes to me about but when i try to offer her solutions she always backs out & makes excuses for him. we have been friends for over 20 years btw. i even offered to stay with me and be financially dependent on me like she is with him until she got on her feet. over years and years ive been trying to convince her to leave him and that she deserves better. but she gets mad at me and says he "really is a good guy" & i just dont understand their relationship. she always tells me i have to be nice to him when he's around or else i get penalized for it. recently her other friends made plans to go out drinking one night and ES couldnt go because of her daughter, she had no one to watch her. anyways they went to breakfast the next morning and they didnt invite her. so shes mad and venting to me about it & eventually says shes just going to cut them off, saying fuck them for not inviting her & keeping her "apart of the group". all while im over here thinking its an honest mistake, they thought she wouldnt be able to come because she wasnt able to the night before, just tell them how she felt but also understand why they wouldn't think to invite her. then she talks about how shes the type of person of "if you fuck me over once its fuck you" and i didnt say it but im thinking, youre only like that with your friends but never your man. who is literally your biggest hater mind you, but ok. fast forward to today and i find out this girl is getting rid of her two emotionally invested cats for her fuck ass boyfriend. so he could get a puppy. like youve had one cat for almost 5 years and the other for almost 2 and you getting rid of them just like that??? for a puppy that your bf wanted? all of a sudden its because he's "allergic", mind you he ain't like the cats from the git but again, ok. like you dont deserve your pets if youre gonna be like that. and now shes just tryna give them away for free on facebook!!! like theyre an old jacket or something????? like ouuu im just so irritated. am i overreacting? idk what to do. i dont want to stop being friends w her because he gives family annihilator vibes and i want her to have someone to turn to if things get worse with him but being friends with her is so exhausting sometimes. what should i do?