I will probably marry someone I shouldn't

Tldr: Cant form romantic relationships due to mental health issues, parents want me to get married and are sick of my excuses, agreed to marry any guy of their choice for everyone's happiness.

Hi all, this is going to be a very long post but I just need to get it all out. I (28 F) am diagnosed with ADHD and AVPD. Was diagnosed pretty late in life and struggled a lot prior to that. The thing is nobody saw that struggle because I was really good at studies, the golden child of the family really. The huge expectations I had on me made me mask pretty well, to the point only a few people actually know me. My parents dont even know about my diagnosis, they wouldn't understand either.

Because of the AVPD I dont actually develop much feelings for people. This especially goes for romantic feelings. Like even if I end up somewhat liking a guy and he reciprocates as well I still wont actually do much about it. I dont even feel hurt when it doesn't go anywhere, like I genuinely dont care. Could be somewhere on the asexual spectrum, never been sexually attracted to any person in my life. Although idk if its actually me being ace or because of the AVPD.

Now my parents want me to get married which is not unreasonable, I am of age, but everytime I start talking to a guy my parents introduce me to it just feels like a responsibility. My mom found this perfect rishta for me last year, the guy was nice, his mom was amazing and he had genuinely liked me a lot. But I just couldn't do it. Talking to him felt like a chore, I even met him and the whole time I just wanted to go back. Since I felt that way I declined, much to the anger of my parents and the heartbreak of that guy (I really feel sorry for him). But I figured if I continued feeling that way after the wedding I'll ruin his life too alongside mine.

My parents say its difficult to find guys for me in the first place, I live in Mumbai and not a lot of guys from my community live here apparently (they want me to marry within the community since this would be an arranged marriage, they wouldn't care if it were a love marriage. I dont care either way) .The remaining guys my parents introduce me to I cant connect with. I think my parents are fed up of me at this point. Today my mom told me that I was to meet the parents of this one guy on the weekend (I have talked to him twice, he's okay but nothing remarkable. Yet to see if we're compatible or not and all that). And I saw in her words that she just wants to be done with this. So I said I'll marry whoever she chooses for me. Its not like waiting any longer would change anything except increasing my parents' stress level, and I dont wanna be alone my entire life either. I guess I'll just have to fake my happiness and affection to a certain degree. I dont think there's any way I'll actually be happy in an arranged marriage but then I do deserve it for being born so wrong. I will definitely discuss all this with the guy beforehand and if he agrees I'll try my best to fulfill his expectations. But yeah seems like I exhausted my quota of happiness in this life.