Wanting to quit after 6 years for selfish reasons

Hello all! I figured I’d come to this sub to post how I’ve been feeling at my current childcare job. Im a male teacher who started working in childcare at 16, it was my first job. However as time has gone by and I’ve matured, I’m now 22, my thoughts and feelings about working in childcare has drastically shifted and I wanted to know if anybody here has felt the same and how they overcame it. Apologies in advance for the essay.

For backstory, my mom was a director so that gave me an in, started working after school programs and before school programs during the school year and full time in the summers. I loved it, it was fast paced, electric, fulfilling and so fun. I made friends with every child in the facility and had unique relationships with all of them, my coworkers weren’t so fond of me but honestly who is fond of the wild 16 year old boy who comes in and riles up the entire class? I stayed at this childcare center on and off for 5 years before the owner and I had a dramatic falling out which prompted me to quit in the summer of 24 and find something else.

Fast forward 3 months of job hunting that led nowhere, I got a call back from a different childcare facility that I interviewed at years prior, expressing that they wanted to hire me to lead their 3 year old classroom and pay me a good wage to do so, about $21 an hour which allowed me to finally move out with my girlfriend and be financially independent. This was in October 2024 I started this job.

However, as of recently, good god I want OUT of childcare. I cannot stress how much I simply do not care about this job or career anymore. When I started in childcare, I used to be the first one in the building and last one out at the end of the day purely because I loved the kids and being a teacher, I always went above and beyond in our lessons and had no reservations about spending my own money on things like a disco ball or a new Bluetooth speaker or more markers as long as it made the kids happy.

Nowadays, I show up a minute before my shift starts and leave at the first chance of being in ratio at the end of the day. I don’t care about being a good teacher, I don’t really care about meeting goals or managing curriculum. The only thing I truly care about is making sure the kids are safe and ensuring that all my kids are being treated kindly, respectfully, and doing the same for others. During my 90 day review, my director asked me what goals I had in childcare so she could help me succeed, I didn’t realize then but now I do, that I genuinely have no aspiring goals in childcare. I’m so goddamn bored at work and can’t stop thinking to myself “What am I getting out of this besides paid?” What am I learning right now?” “What can I do throughout the day to keep myself entertained?” It’s an awful mindset to be in because I know it’s unfair to the kids, but even then I don’t really care either. I just feel the urge to be selfish for once and choose myself and my happiness and just quit, regardless of the bind it puts my assistant teacher and coworkers in.

Has anyone else gone through this? I’m currently looking for a new job but everyday I spend working here feels like I’m just rotting my brain. I’m worried that I’m going to become complacent here and wake up in 5-6 years thinking of all the things I could have been doing with this time. Could use some advice, thanks for the help.