Need help

I stay at home with my 20 MO and lately it’s been so hard keeping my emotions regulated during tantrums, when he refuses nap time, refuses meals. I will never hit my child EVER and have tried my hardest to never raise my voice too loud, but I am starting to crack, I surprise myself by yelling as an immediate reaction and I am so hurt by the way he looks at me. Please someone anyone anything will help I will try anything…. I am my sons safe space and I feel like I am failing so hard right now at being that):