My journey

Hey everybody! I have been feeling my twin very intensely since the eclipses/retrograde and the only person I can safely talk about this with is my best friend who definitely does not understand it (which I understand that she doesn’t understand), especially since I am engaged to be married to a wonderful soulmate of a man who has loved me since we were 16 (we are now both about to be 29). My twin and I have an age gap if that is relevant, he is 43. I had been thinking to myself, who can I talk about this with to feel some sort of validation?? As this has also been a journey of trusting my intuition as sometimes it feels this is all just in my head as nothing has happened in the 3D.

I met my twin at my old job that I started in 2021. At the time I was dating my now fiancé and my twin has been in the same relationship this whole time (not married, and he’s told me before he never plans on marrying her).

Beginning of 22 I got a promotion and I was told I would start training with my Twin who I hadn’t really had any reason to get to know or be around or speak to him as he was in upper management. Around this time Ash and I had been talking about marriage. Long story short after booking a date he told me I was moving too fast and was heartbroken. I then started working with my Twin the next week and I just felt so connected to him and started not even to worry about the heartbreak I was feeling.

To go ahead and preface, Twin and I have never been physically intimate or confessed feelings but I have just been so sure that he’s felt the same in his own shut down way. He was known at the office for being a jerk and cold but to me he was always patient and warm and there were even times that I noticed he would help me out on projects without saying anything to me about it, just making sure my work was done and correct and that I’d be prepared at meetings.

As time went on and we started getting closer (as close as he would let me, I’m known as being a bubbly open book and him not so much) I became a bit more obsessive (but did what I could to not let on to this) and swore we had telepathy and he’d be in my dreams - I remember two where we were talking to one another but I couldn’t hear any sound which doesn’t happen in my dreams typically. I almost feel it was like our higher selves communicating.

My feelings for him were so intense that I could not ethically stay in my relationship with Ash. I was hoping things would happen with Twin because when I told Twin I was breaking up with Ash he was very interested and asked me if I thought it would be for good this time. I said yes, and soon after broke up with Ash and moved out on my own.

I had a huge spiritual awakening during this time. I’ve always been intuitive but now I was SURE of it and was constantly feeling synchronicity and in tune with spirit. It felt like my calling. Even without being with Twin I felt I was at my happiest I’d ever been in my life with this union with Spirit.

However for months nothing happened with Twin so I started casually dating to try and make him jealous (which I think it kind of did, I remember him one day asking if I had a hot date that night and then not talking to me, and he signed me up for a homeless dating website..lol…….). Then one day, our CEO came to my apartment and tried to coerce me into sex and I rejected him. Shortly after that, I was terminated, the CEO saying they had eliminated my position. Twin didn’t give me a heads up. I still don’t know if he knew or not.

Summer of 23 I got back together with Ash and we moved in together because I had run out of money for my apartment. Had been happy overall but still thinking about Twin everyday. Ash proposed in spring of 24, we are set to marry in October of this year. I freaked out inside which no one knows. Big wedding planned by our families.

Twin and I have had two brief bursts of communication. One was minuscule - last year I had to reschedule out to get my W2. Nothing personal there.

Now, Ash and I just closed on a house this week. March 7th (the day we actually ended up looking at the house we just bought) I had a realization about my Twin that made me see he loved me too. It’s hard to explain but it came to me and I was just so sure. I felt his energy OVERWHELMINGLY and an intuitive I deeply trust but isn’t into the whole twin flame thing confirmed it was his energy because he was thinking about reaching out to me (and that I shouldn’t respond). HOWEVER, I ended up having to reach out to him because my mortgage lender needed to confirm my income with that company and their phone number is out of service lol. So we talked briefly about me getting a house. He seemed proud of me. Then last week I still felt very chasy and sent him something I’d seen as like an inside joke. He responded and then I sent another funny text but immediately unsent it so I wasn’t expecting a response. But the next morning at SEVEN AM (so maybe I was one of the first things he thought about?) he text me asking how the new house was. I responded and he thumbed it up. A few hours later I sent a message saying I missed him and I would be open to catching up if he’s ever open to it. That was Saturday and no response but I don’t regret sending it because at least he will know that if he feels the same, that I have been thinking about him and he’s not crazy. But now IM feeling crazy. Also hesitant about my upcoming marriage. I also forgot to mention that since being back with Ash it felt like my spiritual side diminished and is only now flourishing again feeling Twin’s energy.

Anyway guys…new to this specific community. Am I crazy lol? Any words of advice? Anyone relate? Thank you in advance and I look forward to connecting with you ❤️