What‘s wrong with me

Hey everyone, I’m a 28-year-old guy and I’ve been single my entire life. I’ve never been on a date, never had a girlfriend, never been in a relationship.

Lately, I’ve started wondering what’s actually wrong with me. Everyone in my friend group is either married, engaged, or has been in a long-term relationship. I’m the only one who’s never brought anyone home.

I go to the gym regularly, have a stable and well-paid job, I take care of my appearance, always smell good… overall I’d say I look pretty decent. I don’t think that’s where the issue lies — I often catch women looking at me, exchanging glances, and I notice the attention.

The problem is me. I’m just an emotional wreck because I’ve gone through life for 28 years with zero experience. I don’t know what it feels like to be loved, or to love someone. I don’t even know if I actually want a relationship, because I’ve never had one.

How can I miss something I’ve never even had? And yet… I do want to find out what it’s like.

But in my mind, it already feels too late. I’m 28, and most 15-year-olds have had more experience than me.

My last kiss was probably when I was 16 to 18, at some party. That’s it. Back in my teens, there were a few small things here and there, but nothing worth mentioning.

I’m not a virgin anymore, but that was a drunken, meaningless one-night thing with someone I didn’t know — I barely even remember it.

I genuinely think I am the problem. I’ve more or less come to terms with being single forever. And the fact that I’ve never had a relationship or any real romantic experience only makes it worse. I’m extremely shy and introverted.

I do go out with friends on the weekends, and once I’ve had a few beers, things go better with women — I often get their Instagram or phone numbers. But once I’m sober the next day, I’m already sweating just thinking about saying hi. And in the end, I just don’t.

So yeah, I’m completely lost. Because deep down, I know I’ll never go on a date — not because I don’t want to, but because my mind won’t let me.

“Just do it” doesn’t work for me. It’s not that simple.

Sorry for the long and maybe slightly chaotic post, but I just needed to get this off my chest.