Did my husband cheat

Think my husband might have cheated on me a year and a half ago when our son was a new baby. It’s not so much what happened but his response to it. Sorry for the novel but figured should give the whole story.

Before we were married/ had kids I would have never ever thought my husband would ever cheat on me. Head over heels for me treated me like a princess. he was my best friend, was so kind to me, it was like he spent all day just trying to make me happy, i married him because I knew he’d make a great dad and great husband and I’d have a happy easy life with him. 100% full trust amazing healthy relationship.

when my first baby was born our relationship took a turn. We were always fighting, we never talked unless it had to do with the baby, I felt alone like a single mom but with help, we had no connection or relationship it was like the person I knew disappeared. Barely had sex. He changed, I’m sure I changed too. I had some post partum depression and anxiety. My life revolved around my baby who i was obsessed with and the baby became my #1 instead of him . He went from the sweetest human I’ve ever met to a straight a** hole. My first son is 2 now , we just had our second child and our relationship has improved a lot and I feel like I know him again and I feel like myself again.

When my baby was about 6 months old, I was at work one day and my mom watched the kids, my husband got the baby from my mom. When I got home the first thing my husband said to me was “hey if your mom says anything to you about a girls name on my phone it was (my cousin’s) cousin. She texted me right while your mom was next to my phone and she looked at it and I thought oh great she’s gonna think something’s up and tell you that but just so you know that’s who it is” I said what?? I’ve NEVER heard of this girl before? In my husband’s culture he considers everyone even friends his cousin. His cousin he mentioned isn’t even technically his cousin( close family friend) . So Even though it’s his cousins cousin (it is I checked ) is not real family.

My mom never mentioned it to me because why would she? My thing is if a male cousin or any male’s at all name popped up on my phone and my MIL saw the last thing I would ever think is oh shit she’s gonna say something to my husband or think that was weird? because if it’s not anything shady why would it be? I have never questioned him before but this just gave me a weird feeling. He said she texted him because her husband was considering joining his baseball league… okay, could have been he did have one at the time, but I ask to see the text. He deleted it. He’s always deleted his texts on his phone because of storage and I’ve always known this, but if you were worried about my mom telling me about this why wouldn’t you keep the text? And to delete that fast? When I questioned him about this he got super defensive it turned into a fight, I felt like I knew something was up and if I was in my normal state of mind I would have been all over this but honestly I was struggling with PPD, PPA, and all I cared about was my baby at the time so I let it go and enjoyed time with my son.

Well now a 1 1/2 years later I feel normal, our relationships great and I can’t stop wondering about this. I have since quit my job to stay home with the babies and he works full time. Being able to spend every second with my kids is the best thing to ever happen to me. He’s never given me anything else to worry about, he’s a great dad gets up with the babies at night so I can sleep, wakes up early before work so he can go out and get Dunkin for me so I don’t have to pack up the kids, stuff like that he treats me like he used to, great, is a great dad and we are happy. When I questioned him recently about this now he stilllll got weird about it denies it was anything like that and just seems shady to me.

So do you think he cheated or am I being crazy over thinking this? Am I making something of nothing? And should I even investigate to find out if he did? How would I go about it? Or should I just drop it cause honestly if he did i probably wouldn’t leave him right now anyway. Being with him is the reason i get to spend everyday with my kids and they are my world. I would wait til they are in school and could finish my degree to support them on my own. What do I do?