I’m tired of trying everyday.

I, 24, female don’t know what I’m doing with my life. I’m sick of living just for the sake of my family. I’ve told my mom how I don’t know if I can keep doing this. She’s worried for me and these antidepressants aren’t working for me, so I stopped them cold turkey. She says I just have to keep living.

I hate myself so much. Nothing traumatizing happened to me. It’s just I feel done. Haven’t had much of a drive growing up. Especially in school. I went to school for something I don’t really enjoy doing and don’t know anything else I can do. I feel too stupid to try anything else and I don’t want to work in high stress areas. My life is so boring and I barely make the effort to make friends. No one sees me struggling. I haven’t cried in a while since taking my anti depressants and typing this is making me emotional. I just feel so upset with myself right now. I wish I liked reading books or doing creative things but I don’t. I feel useless and gross. I try to exercise but end up giving up and have gained a lot of weight. I was on 75 mg of sertraline, but I don’t know if so should try something else. I just feel like sharing this just in case people feel the same way. You’re not alone. I’ll still keep on trying sadly.