I may be falling for my friend

Rant

I've never been interested in love (since there's practically nobody here that I take interest in, anyway). Probably except for a friend. He's a great guy; good personality, vibes with me on the same level, we share a good amount of common interests. Thing is, I've never thought of anyone (especially him) as more than friends. I came out to a couple of people online upon saying that I attended prom without a partner (it's a normal occurrence). Of course, they weren't accepting that I go out to prom with nobody, so they pushed me to find a date. I repeatedly said no, affirming my lack of options and disinterest in romance. They didn't budge. Eventually, they settled on a conclusion that I should get said friend on a date. I never did, due to the fact I think he's disinterested in me, anyway. Fast forward after prom, while I was on my way home, it hit me. I'm wasting my teenage years on making too much friends, and it's probably high time I try to make deeper connections with my current friends. And so, on the same night, after prom, I jokingly texted him (through a group chat) that we should be together. He didn't outright deny, just said that "maybe " or "soon". Ever since yesterday, we've been jokingly flirty with each other (even right in front of our friends), and we jokingly do it in private, too. The thing is, I don't think I feel like I'm joking with these anymore. I've found myself replying him immediately whenever he messages, even way before prom night. I don't know if it's because I don't have a lot of guy friends (90% of my irl friends are gals, and I only know dudes online), or if I actually feel something more.

Any inputs regarding this? I've never actually felt like this before; I've really accepted the fact I'm never gonna find love.

P.S if you're here, and you recognize yourself, I beg of you, I don't want our friendship to go wrong.

Posted Apr 15, 2025, 7:32 PM UTC

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