F.ck this shit

"what doesn't kill you make you stronger" MY ASS. It's funny how every single part of my life is ruined. Not existent. Not developed. Friends? LOL. Love? LOL. Education? LOL. Dissociating all university. Fucked up at the end anyway. You need experience. When I was supposed to get experience, I was mentally out of it. So how about a job?? LOL. Now try to explain to other people why you are 10 years late with everything. I barely remember the last ten years. I am literally in a place now where I SHOULD BE 10 YEARS AGO. Good fucking luck to me starting life being thirty. I can cry all day that "i should've done all this shit long time ago" but whats the fucking point. Time is just passing me by, and I don't remember what I was doing most of it. Do you know what is also funny? Money didn't help either. I went to a few therapists, and I was on two long therapies, and it didn't help. People don't get it. It's like no matter what I do, I am still behind mentally. It's like there is no way to speed the process at all. Shame is just eating me alive. Fuck this shit