Too Soon to Attend Wedding?

TL;dr - nervous about attending a wedding 4.5 weeks after LTKR. Suggestions needed.

I'm 53f, heavy, chronic systemic joint osteoarthritis through most of my body, rheumatoid arthritis and extremity fibromyalgia. Add in two lumbar spinal fusions that are helping me stay vertical but I will never be fully without pain. I pulled the joint genetics short straw.

My daughter is a bridesmaid in a very close friend's wedding four and a half weeks after a LTKR. Unfortunately, the venue is an hour and a half away from home and the plan is to stay there for several days leading up to the wedding and go home the next day. My daughter will drive and I plan on having at least one pit stop along the route to get out, stretch, and relieve some pressure. I'm not going to be expected to help with a lot but I would really love to participate as much as possible. I plan on bringing ice packs and a cooler with me.

Main Questions -- Has anyone managed to pull something like this off? I really, really want to be there. Is there such a thing as some sort of a knee brace to help relieve extra pressure and swelling between the time that I sit for the wedding and make my way to the reception hall where I can discreetly ice? Has anyone been in a similar situation and what did you do? Any other words of wisdom? I plan on starting PT the very next day after surgery. Right now, my surgeon wants me to plan on PT a minimum of three times a week. Rather than getting an ice machine, I will be using ice packs because it will be easier than loading the ice machine with actual ice. I'll need to miss formal PT while I am gone.

Secondary -- Ladies, what's the chance I could pull off a medium wedge heel? I don't wear regular high heels anymore but love my Dansko, Alegria, and Aetrex. Sometimes Vionic has shoes that are supportive enough. I could also probably get away with a funky pair of Chuck's with a replacement footbed insert for better balance than could go with my dress, if I ought to.

Too many questions? 😆