Some Advice: Tackling the contradiction of feeling like a victim VS embracing responsibility

I am not in anyway suggesting that this post will resonate with everyone on this sub, but for those of you who are a bit further along with your NPD journey- I wanted to share some thoughts on what I experienced upon accepting my diagnosis then later reflecting daily on my past through my updated perspective.

So… if you’re someone who had to once face the immense confusion/difficulty in having to come to terms with your NPD diagnosis…. I know many many people whose progress had sadly stopped at that stage and they never pursued improving as the shock and cognitive dissonance was too much.

However, for those who eventually accepted it (including myself), I speak only through my own experiences here, but it seems pretty obvious that the immediate ‘go to’ is to find someone to blame for our disorder as the immense struggle in dealing with all of this news is a f’n whirlwind!

Managing to overcome this stage takes time, it takes effort, professional help is hugely helpful too. I eventually got to the very difficult stage of having a few painful conversations with those people in my past who impacted my childhood/contributed to me developing this disorder.

As much as those talks hurt them as much as me, it’s then that next stage where you can either take solace in being vindicated OR you make peace with it and develop the strength to be responsible for our future actions/lives.

For me- before I was ever aware of my disorder or was able to see that my perspective on the world and the people on it was misguided- I can’t beat myself up anymore for that as that doesn’t lead to progress. It’s about what we all do after we are aware that really makes the difference.

As always, I hope that helps someone but feel free to reach out if I can help further 🙌🙌👊