My new doctor ruined my life

I am so drained and recently all I feel is anger. I am not even an angry person.

I have adhd, c-ptsd, anxiety and a very complex insomnia.

I have been using imovane/stilnoct since I was 17 and now I am 33. I havent got therapy because it was never the right time to both understand and treat the insomnia.

The lack of sleep is ruining me. My doctor refuses to put me back on my working medication because "bad and addictive"

Bitch please! I am probably more healthy than you. I dont drink since 2013, also no drugs, and my squats are more fine than yours.

Anyway, the last 8 months my whole person has been degraded to a pill addict, which of course doesnt feel very good. My whole life went from casual adhd issues to something much darker.

My new doctor is aware of my extreme panic attacks, which isolates me. She refuses to give therapy because "not working with sleeping pills". My adhd medication is only giving me more panic attacks because I am always lacking sleep.

I am allowed to overdose 30 other pills every damn night because my doctor says they are not addictive so its fine.

I dont even have energy to live because these amount of pills are fucked up. I feel so hang over every day.

What really hurts me is the fact that this doctor is very much aware that adhd and insomnia is related, and I dont even get any serious help other than she being lazy and just removes my sleep and says YOU CAN DO IT!!

I dont know what to do anymore. I have this constant headache, I am freaking out because I dont regognize myself anymore.