Online Friends

Hi, first post here. Wasn't sure if I wanted to post at all, I've spent most of my life keeping everything in especially as most of my problems feel insignificant.

I used to have a few RL friends before I moved over 5-6 years ago, and have only stayed connected with one since but aren't anywhere near as close anymore, and hardly even talk.

Here in the current town, I have a RL friend I made while here that I made from a previous job, and they're a great friend who I trust immensely. However we don't really talk much aside from the one time we hangout which is maybe once every couple of months, for a number of reasons.

All that context to say, I rely on and generally prefer online communication nowadays.

I have internet 'friends', but they feel more like acquaintances who I feel that I always have to bother to hang out with me, and never invite me to anything but do things together with each other. I feel generally like I'm a nice person and very accepting of others, trying to always go out of my way to do stuff they would want to do but feel no reciprocation from them, and most of the time they reject my invites anyways. Bare in mind, I've been friends with these people for over 5 years.

I feel lonely and like there's no point and keeping them as 'friends' but maybe I just expect too much from people who only know each other through the internet.

Though I know of others with great friendships that they've made over the internet and sound nothing like what I have, and it gives me the sense that my feelings are valid.

At least I have my partner, who I appreciate very much, but relying solely on them for company is not something I want to burden them with.

I just feel like I must be boring or something if I can't keep friends intetested in the idea of hanging out with me.

Anyways, just venting. Thanks r/lonely, I'm glad I found this community.