I (20M) have set boundaries to girlfriend (21F) and she thinks I just don’t want her to be happy or have fun

I (20M) have been dating my girlfriend (21F) for 1 year now.

 For some context my girlfriend loves the bar. She’s always been a party person ever since going to college. I think it’s a standard in a relationship to go out and I made it clear that I don’t like her going there. I just think it’s not a good environment, I have full trust in her and I simply don’t want my girlfriend in the bar scene where people are getting drunk and it’s a setting where people go to hook up. Before dating her she was one that went to the bar all the time and did that type of stuff, that might be a reason why I don’t like her going. I don’t like it because she spends a lot of money going, she runs into people from her past history. 

 She is also surrounded by vaping when she goes to the bar and it’s something I told her I dislike. She used to vape for 4 years and I don’t like her doing it (in a nice way). I helped her quit but everytime she goes to the bar she always gets one in her hand by her friends, I am personally unattracted to girls who vape because I think it’s a poor financial decision and bad for your health, and I don’t want to get addicted because she does it. She has lessened the amount of times going out by working on the weekends but I feel like everytime she gets a random day off on a weekend she looks to going out, and her friends can mention it once and she will jump on the chance of going.

 From my point of view I don’t mind her drinking casually but seeing her drunk is just really unattractive to me. She loses all senses and can’t handle her drinks.

 I get upset because everytime she makes up an excuse for her to go out “my friend bought me a bottle”, “I’m going to be a wingman for my friend” I feel like this is just worse than just telling me she wants to go out. 

 Recently she had just turned 21 and Friday she went out with her friends for her birthday (which I don’t mind because she said it would be the only time this week), the following day Saturday she is hosting a birthday party with her family and friends. I got upset because she had told me she wasn’t going to go out and she was going to spend time with her family. Both her brothers traveled back home to visit and we don’t get to see them often and they were super excited to celebrate with her. Her friends had asked her to go out that night and she said no. The plan was with the family was to go play games at the park and I decided to go with the cousin to pick up some stuff and had communicated with the family that I will meet them there. All of her family showed up and she decided to go to the bar with her friends. After having a good time with her family I drive them back home and I get a call from her asking me to pick her up from the bar.  I told her that I won’t be spending the night because I have work in the morning. I then picked her up and had a talk with her and I think my emotions were getting out of hand. I had asked her if she’s going to change and she and I went back and forth about the whole going out ordeal. She got mad then the last 10 minutes back to her house it was silent. I then dropped her off at her house and went home because I didn’t feel like sleeping over because I was upset and I had work the following day. She then spam calls me to pick her up and says everyone in her family there hates her. I’m assuming they are annoyed about what I had talked to her on the ride home. Even though I was mad I still love and care about her, so I came back and brought her to my house to sleep, she was crying and I dropped everything and just comforted her.

 Morning rolls around and I’m having a talk with her over text and she is telling me that she feels like it’s not only me but everyone is telling her what not to do and she feels like everyone is trying to control her. 

 I’m reaching out because I might be the problem and was wondering how I can try and fix it? because I truly want things to work out because we have such a good connection. (P.S this is my very first serious relationship and I would appreciate the feedback)