Cord cutting

I was in a relationship with my son's dad for 7 years & we share a beautiful 5 year old son together. He was a narcissist & i was trauma bonded. I still love him deeply, but i know I need to let go. I still feel his enegry, emotions that I know are his. I know i need to let go, but I'm scared. I really want to do the cord cutting ritual, but hesitant, cause i'm scared to let go. Should I wait until I'm fully ready to let go?