Personal vent

Before my husband and I married back in July we took a break . We weren't together for 5 months. During that time I did some personal growth and sought life advice from my family and others. I knew I still loved him and the more time passed I knew I wanted to be with him. When we reconnected he also seemed to be happier and happy to hear from me. We started talking again. I had full intention to be back with him and it seemed like he did too. It was about a month back into the relationship that I found out he had been talking to one of his coworkers. They had texted back and forth all day everyday and had hour long phone conversations. Something we had never even done . :( I was devastated. I started to wonder if they had started to talk before I decided I wanted to take a break. He said he was devastated when he heard thats what I wanted but I couldn't and still can't shake the thought that he was interested in someone else even before that. I feel haunted. I'm always thinking maybe he only cut all ties with this other girl and quit his job because he felt obligated too. I had made it very clear that it was me or her.. I later met up with this "other woman." Shes the opposite of me. She's blonde, very thin, and has a "i don't give a f**k attitude " shes also a single mom of three who works hard and takes care of them and herself. I have kids too and do my best. I'm taller, im bigger and I have a lot of self esteem issues . Which I know is a turn off. God I hate it!!! Anyways when I met with her she talked my ear off for over an hour. She swore they never did ANYTHING. they hung out a few times but that was it. He took her and her two boys out to olive garden. Which he swear was not a date. Went to her house.... he says only once, to the bar, and to work related events. People at work were starting to even "joke about them being a couple. Towards the end of our conversation she informed me that she "maybe only did one thing that was wrong." She said that my now husband lent her cash for her boudoir session. She said she sent him a picture after the fact. I REPEAT ONLY ONE PICTURE . she showed me the photo. It was risqué but not nearly as much as the others that had been taken. I freaked out. I said that was wrong and that I wasn't happy about it. My heart broke and still feels broken. Considering we've had some major issues with our sexual life doesn't help. I now feel even worse than I did before we took a break 💔 on top of that he deleted every message, phone call, and any pictures that were taken during the month that we were separated. I'll never know the full extent of what was or wasn't talked about. How he or she felt. I can't help but feel like I already do know. I can't talk about it because we both shut down in our own ways. I think he feels like I already know the truth so he shouldn't have to confirm to make things worse. I should just get over it, right? We were separated, We fought, we sorta worked through it but the unknowns still haunt me. Any personal experiences or advice?