Can’t decide if I should trust her
I met a girl through arrange marriage setup. Have been talking with her for a while(almost a year). We are located in different countries that’s why, I have met her only 2-3 times but we have lived together for a month.
When I started talking with her she appeared to be really sweet and caring person with deep family bonds. She puts extra efforts for people she care and to be honest no one has cared for me this much.
We have had quite a few arguments over very silly things(like politics or my own personal exes) and later I realized that she can be really stubborn and won’t listen to reason at all. Also she becomes really jealous even if I complement a colleague. But the main point of contention was her friends, which I found to be really cheap and low class. I had often complained to her about this and she always claimed that it is just her friends but she has high morales and integrity. Her one guy friend in particular, I didn’t like and couldn’t imagine talking to him. But she repeated that it is just her friends and not her.
Now one day I was going through her text and I found that she has lied to me about that living with a girl roommate. Actually she has been living with the same guy for past 2 years. When I confronted her, she said she lied at the start as she assumed I wouldn’t understand and later couldn’t build up courage to speak the truth.
I lost all my trust but still wanted to understand her. I started going though her text and I found that she dated the same guy earlier, so basically she has been living with her ex(who got married some months ago)
When I confronted her about that she said she lied because she didn’t want to be sl*t shamed and that her ex meant nothing to her.Also claimed that they were just roommates now and didn’t get intimate. I also got to find out that she had more partners then she had admitted before (she claimed she had just one before but it turns out she had 4)
The way she treats me I was convinced that she loves me but I was not sure and I had told that to her. Also she had fought with me earlier because I had too many partners earlier while claiming she had just one.
All my friends think that she is a trophy wife. But I have been conflicted from the very start, firstly because of her circle, then later because of all her lies. At the same time she supports me and cares for me a lot. But she didn’t come forward with even one of the lies, I found all of them on my own.
From my side I have been perfect for too. I had trouble moving on with one of my ex, even though I have maintained no contact with her for years. I told her about this and she fought with me about that but later understood.
I don’t know if I should give her another chance, or am I just fool to keep on trusting her.
Posted May 5, 2025, 2:07 AM UTC