Ex-friend (f26) who ghosted me (f28) months ago now wants to rekindle. How do I handle this?
So last night at around 2:30am I (f28) got a call from my ex friend Sharon (f26) who ghosted me September 2024 to say she misses me and regrets what she did. Some back story here is I’ve known Sharon for about like 2 yrs and started getting closer when myself and another friend let’s call her Karen (f25) fell out. Sharon and I got close quick, met each others families and were often seen together a lot by our mutual friends so it was apparent we were inseparable. My issue started when Sharon had went behind my back it felt to make amends w Karen. I had expressed them being friends doesn’t bug me it’s more so that Karen called the cops on Sharon over a physical altercation the 3 of us got into and we had seen Karen around a few times before so it felt like weird timing since Sharon never mentioned prior how she was likely feeling about Karen so it was strange to me. Especially since Sharon was really riding for me when I was having my own issues with Karen which had lead to our fall out. Sharon was present for all of that w Karen and I so she knew we weren’t on good terms and had even said she was on my side only. So after I explained how it felt to find out she was making amends with an enemy behind my back from other friends was hurtful, we tried to establish our friendship and focus back on just us and having silly fun like laughing or going on picnics. Sharon and I followed through and we had gone on a picnic at the end of August 2024 and we had a great time or so I thought because then very shortly after I had texted Sharon for us to hang out again and I had gotten no reply. Sharon in the past has told me she purposely ignored texts to be on instagram but wouldn’t ignore mine. Sharon eventually ended up ghosting me. I had double, triple and quadruple texted her to say cute things we all do to our gfs like “miss u girl let’s do something this weekend?” Or even “I just heard of restaurant I wanna try, let’s go!” And I would get no response despite her posting on other social media platforms. There was even a time after I had seen Sharon out at an event with mutual friends but she acted very weird but clearly distancing herself from me when normally we would be locked together at the hip. So naturally I started to spiral because I was seeing Sharon in public and she would even say hi to me but actively avoid me all while I’m texting her to hang out and telling her “where have u been I miss u let’s hang out” when I would run into her. Her not responding to me went on for a month before I decided ok I don’t think she’s texting me back to hang out. THEN I have people sending me Sharon’s instagram story and it’s her and Karen together clinking their martinis for a boomerang. After seeing that I won’t lie I was super hurt and upset to the point where I I had to tell myself ‘ok clearly this is why and clearly we aren’t friends’ which led to me unfollowing Sharon on instagram and we never spoke again until last night. So now knowing the back story hopefully u can see why im struggling how to handle this. On one hand im kinda happy I got an apology because I didnt do anything to warrant that but im also skeptical where this came from. Last night was also her bday so I don’t know if it was a drunk realization despite her saying no. She did mention to me that her mom kept bringing me up and that she knows good people and that she regrets ghosting me and not talking to me. While on the call I was curious why she didn’t just talk to me instead of ghosting so I did probe for that and she said it was because she was a coward and couldn’t but again idk if this is an excuse or if she’s apologizing to clear her conscience. Any perspectives are welcomed and appreciated as I feel this will help me decide what I wanna do since I dont have much experience with this
Posted May 5, 2025, 2:12 AM UTC