Confused now

I don’t know whether or not I should be angry because after weeks…months of not speaking and I chose to come over and just stop you to just talk to you to find out what is happening…you used my other friends against me, I live alone in a city that I don’t know anyone but you and you are upset that my friends are on my phone? I have been questioning my feelings toward you, you blamed them and told me that you felt like I was pushing you out when I am the one that wanted you to come over, when I’m the one that gave ideas for us to do and you shut me out but it’s my fault that my other friends keep me busy when you abandon me…you were quick to say that…but something that hurt was “I talk too much about chaos”…so I can’t talk to you, my friend, my sister about what is going around me that is causing shifts in my moods…that’s cool, I won’t talk about it but when you question what is going on with me I’m going to be shocked that you want to hear about my “chaos”…what am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to sit here and let you tell me that you aren’t a fan of the people that keep me from going insane but also you say that and expect me to be okay with this…I’m not…I broke down crying…I cried myself to sleep…I can’t stop crying because you chose to hurt me more than I thought…but the thing is, I don’t know if I’m angry or just upset about how you chose your words toward me.