I (38/M) feel needy when I share needs with my wife (35/F), who doesn't help. I feel rejected and shutdown. How do I know what to share and what I need to get over?

This morning, for example. I wake up about 30 mins before her most days. This morning I was feeling a bit disconnected from her and decided to climb back in bed and spoon her. She didn't acknowledge me. When the dog got in the bed right after me she pet and spoke to him. 20 mins later we are both up and eating breakfast and I tell her I felt rejected. She says, annoyed, that she was tired and that if I need her attention I should ask for it. This doesn't feel right to me for two reasons: 1) In the first 2 or 3 years of our 4 year relationship she would have been happy to have me come back to bed and would act accordingly. And 2) She made no effort to reassure me.

Examples like this have been happening a lot, to the point where I question whether or not she is into me any more. In the past I have kept them to myself and that has caused issues. I get resentful and dump everything at once. We've talked about this and I am trying very hard to ask for what I want. It's not easy for me for a couple reasons I have identified with my therapist. I have some macho man voice in my head telling me to be a man and not bother people, and my experience as a child was that my needs were not a priority to anyone but me.

I feel suck and crazy and needy. I'm a 38 YO man and feel some shame about the way a simple micro-rejection can make me feel. I'm literally crying right now. But I also wish my wife was showing up for me, whether I'm needy or not.

Any help would be appreciated.