[update] been wanting to experience gay sex but everyone i meet seems pushy or just giving me bad vibes

Long story short I am pansexual (I think I am, I don't know anymore) been wanting to experience some gay sex but everyone seems to be pushy, too bossy/controlling and toxic I really didn't feel comfortable for any of them.

So After my last post everyone basically told me most people in dating apps are looking quick hookups and a lot of them aren't patient enough for a casual meet up.

So I took these words in and went on grinder seeking random meaningless hookup.

First guy was living far away and wanting me to go all the way there, Nope. Went for second guy and ignored all the alarms in my head he seemed to just want sex and wants it now .

I went to meet him, I got into his car dude didn't waste any time and bada bing Bada bom, we did the deed, it wasn't terrible but very mid and definitely not was I hoped for but that's not how real life works.

I met up with him few times more but I really didn't like him basically demanding to meet him whenever he wants so I called it off.

Spend the last few days doing some soul searching and maybe I am not into men and I just into penises, that explains why I never felt comfortable with every guy I met.

So yeah there is that, it's not exactly the most interesting story that needs an update, I just wanted to get it off my chest.