Aitj for feeling like my partner SAd me

I think he assaulted me. He said it was so long ago. But it’s starting to hit me now.

In the beginning of our relationship, we went on vacation 6 months in. I was asleep, on my period (we never had sex then so it’s not like he was wanting me to participate)

He touched my breasts and jerked off until he finished in a towel. I had no idea of any of it. Until he told me the next morning.

I was visibly uncomfortable and he was like “remember when you told me you wanted to get woken up with dick? I thought it was the same thing”

So I shut up about it and continued our relationship. Assuming it was just a genuine misunderstanding. Since he’s not an evil person and he’s very sexually inexperienced.

Until last summer when I found out about his porn addiction. And he admitted that he masturbated to women by me while I was asleep in bed next to him. Only once or twice as he swears.

I have night terrors from ptsd. I get up and thrash. Kick. Wake up in a confused panic. Even jumping out of bed. He knew this since the beginning of our relationship. Why did he test the waters in my sleep?

I’m trying to leave him and go to different state to restart my life, and he’s like “this was so long ago. You’re acting like I enjoy doing that and do it all the time”

I just don’t know how to feel. He keeps begging me not to leave. I genuinely don’t know if he doesn’t get it or understand (he has adhd and I suspect some level of autism) but idk if I can fully blame that.