Toxic relationship- I feel trapped and I need help

Hi everyone,

I’m 30 now. I met a Saudi man when I was 25, and we’ve been in a long-distance relationship for 4 years. He promised me marriage, that he would come to France, that we’d build a life together. I visited him multiple times in Saudi Arabia. He met my parents, but I never met his. I accepted everything — living in secret, waiting, hoping.

I lent him a lot of money. He refuses to pay it back, saying I hurt him too much emotionally. We fought a lot. I tried to leave many times, but he always pulled me back with promises. He plays on my emotions. Even when I block him, he finds a way to reach me. He even has my parents’ contact info.

Now I feel awful. Like I lost my best years. I always wanted children and a family, and now I’m scared I’ve missed my chance. I’m deeply depressed and feel stuck in this toxic situation. I need help to break free.

Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read or reply.