I can’t human

48 years old was just professionally diagnosed last year after a major meltdown and severe burnout. I took four months off with no job and was severely depressed because of that got a job related to my special interest been added almost a year. It’s not the job that I have an issue with, but it’s our management They micromanage ridicule and belittle you and because of that I’ve been having a series of mini meltdowns that I just feel one of these days is going to lead to a humongous meltdown.

Outside of work life‘s been throwing some hard punches lately as well and I feel that is also not helping the situation at all. I just can’t be an adult. I don’t know how people do it. I’m just ready to throw in the towel. I’m at my breaking point. I can’t do this anymore. I’ve done therapy with absolutely no results. I’ve tried meditating, but I can’t calm my mind down enough. If I wasn’t married and had kids, I’d have blown my fucking head off by now.

I guess I don’t even know where to turn anymore. The job I thought I could handle I’m finding out I can’t handle. I went through vocational rehab rehabilitation, and the only job they could find me was at a gas station. I’m not saying that that is below me by any means , but I do have a college degree. I guess I’m just having a pity party for myself today so boo-hoo to me. I’m done rambling.