Need advice please, husband doesn't acknowledge holidays.

So, here it is another Mother's Day and I know my husband isn't going to do anything for me. I try not to allow myself to get sad because I know he's not going to change, I've shared how it makes me feel, but he doesn't care. I don't know how to get through to him that it's extra hurtful because I make all of his days special. I've thought about not celebrating him, but I don't want to create volatility and resentment.

Mother's Day is especially hard because I recently lost my mother and now struggle when it comes up.

He uses the excuse that he's not romantic and was raised not celebrating holidays, however he has no problem receiving gifts from me on his days and has been touched and cherishes the things I get him and the things I do for him to acknowledge him and make him feel appreciated and valued.

The other element of hurt is that he is a chef so I get to see him making other people's holidays special and he will share with me the romantic or surprise things he does for guests at the restaurant, but claims he doesn't know how to plan dates or give gifts. The few times he's gotten me anything, it's after I became visibly upset and he gets the most thoughtless gifts ever. For me, it's not about spending a lot of money or doing anything extravagant, it's simply about showing that you care about someone by doing things you know they would like or things that would make them feel good based off of your experiences with them.

I'm just so tired of always being forgotten and ignored. He also doesn't buy anything for our children. He says, he shows he cares about us by going to work. But if we were to not acknowledge him, he would claim that he comes last in the family and it's proof that he's only here to be a mule.

I don't know how to fix this but it's wearing on me. He forgot my birthday and anniversary last year even though he chose our wedding date, which is a day before my birthday, so he "wouldn't forget". My kids are also too young to really celebrate anything with me so I just feel unseen as I make special occasions personable, thoughtful, and special for everyone but don't get it back in return. Does anyone have any useful advice?

Tl:dr My chef husband seems to know how to make everyone feel special but me and claims he doesn't know how to celebrate holidays or plan dates since he didn't grow up celebrating anything and isn't romantic, but he has no problem enjoying the work I put into making his days special. How can I get through to him or should I just forget it?