How difficult is it to find someone that can fulfill what you want? And need?

I had a good thing going with someone who ended up ghosting me. “A good thing going” means that I was able to explore with him and know specifically what he expects from me if we were to have a dynamic, however, the dynamic was never made because he ended up ghosting me. I really did feel so much understanding and comfort with him, and he just stopped talking to me. I fully understand why things just come up, he is a busy man and so am I, but I was fully ready to submit to every whim, at any time. We talked about every expectation from both sides, and were close to making a plan to meet. I had posted here and met a man that I thought was very kind and understanding that I am trying to know more about a kinky lifestyle, and then was expected to be obedient. I let him know that I don’t need to obey him, since we don’t have a dynamic, and worded it wrong when I wanted to let him know that it’s okay if he stops being a friend/someone to talk to about kinks and the lifestyle. He also let me know that a submissive switch is different from a submissive, which I already understood. He still seemed to expect that part of me to him and this is just getting very disappointing.

Subs/Submissive switches/ those new to this lifestyle, how often does this happen? Did it take you a while to to find someone you you trust that actually wants you? Do you find that there are expectations with every dom you meet? Because I have, and I’m wondering if I will ever be satisfied ever. Long distance means nothing to me and I just need someone who isn’t lying, doesn’t ghost me, and can actually follow through with what the say to me.