My (28F) decade relationship with bf (30M)

I have been with my bf for a decade. He’s my first relationship and everything. I love our connection, his family, our friends, and things we do. He has been consistent in expressing his love ever since. I love how we have same sense of understanding about a lot of things and our views of the world; except ever since we started we would fight about his phone.

He’s very protective of his phone and would really get stressed about the topic, he mentioned he doesn’t like showing his phone and has trauma from previous relationship. Which I tried to respect. Few years ago, he was trying to “fix” an issue that involved his friends and ex. I saw that his ex messaged him and told him to show it to me but he didn’t and later on admitted he deleted the message (he said he got scared bcoz he knew I was going to get mad; the ex that traumatized him re the phone). I know he wasn’t cheating but it felt like betrayal.. fast forward to now, we made up and tried to move on from it. Recently, I heard a rumor that he was cheating (this was a first time), I asked him to give me his phone and I got to scan quickly and when I went to photos he got it and said he wasn’t comfortable. Right there, I made him choose between me and the phone but sadly, he chose the phone and didn’t give it. He said sorry and said that he really can’t give me what I want. I didn’t really reach confronting him about the cheating rumor. I told him that we should break up, and he cried and told me how sorry he was for hurting me.

I love the decade we spent together and everything in between but it’s also heartbreaking to know that there are some things we can’t compromise until now. What are your thoughts? I feel so lost and hopeless.