Eternally Between a rock and a hard place.

I feel stupid. It happens a lot. But I realized now, that I've been idealizing this transition far too much, I'm about to go from isolated here, to isolated there. I don't know if I'll be able to handle it. My whole reason for doing it now seems completely pointless. I wanted to be closer to friends to family and now I know I won't be able to, not really, not in the way I want to be. It sucks because I know I don't have a choice. If I don't take over this responsibility who will? Noone. And I know that. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I don't feel whole without them. But i don't have a choice. I'm going to be alone again, when the whole point of this was the opposite. I can't ask anyone to subside their own happiness, that's beyond unfair to them, but what do I do now? What's the point. I keep asking myself over and over, when I thought I was doing the thing that would make it worth it, what's the point.