Custie moments from the last couple weeks

Some details have been changed for anonymity.

Me just minding my own business at reg when a custie who I have never interacted with in my life suddenly interrupts a transaction

• Custie: "IF YOU'RE GOING TO KICK ME OUT THEN YOU SHOULD PUT UP A SIGN"
• Me: "??? I'm sorry, I'm in the middle of helping this customer..."
• Custie: "JUST BECAUSE I DIDN'T BUY ANYTHING, DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN KICK ME OUT. THIS IS PUBLIC PROPERTY."
• Me: "Miss, I'm sorry, but I have no idea who you are or what you're talking about. Would you like to speak to my supervisor?"
• Custie: "THIS IS PUBLIC PROPERTY."
• Me: "We rent this space from the mall. That means that not only do we have the right to refuse service to anyone, the mall does too. That makes it like double private property.
• Custie exits, while threatening to call the police to sue us (?)*

"Can I get a cookie? Leave it in the plastic." Later, after he receives his cookie "Excuse me, this isn't heated."

After being told that I can't heat the lemon loaf, because it'll catch fire "So... are you going to heat it or not?"

"WHY WOULD YOU HAVE TWO STRAWBERRY FLAVORED CAKE POPS IT'S SO CONFUSING."

After spilling their drink all over the floor "You should clean that up before someone slips."

"I just want to give you some feed back... the food at McDonald's is just so much better."

"I'd like a Venti hoar-chatter please."

"Why would you call it Summer Berry when it's obviously just Blue Raspberry?"

After asking what the WiFi is called, and being told it's just "Starbucks." "That's such a weird choice. Shouldn't it be called WiFi?"

"Can I get a decaf Pike please? I don't like the taste of coffee."