AITA for opening Up! someone else's mail?

I’m Eileen! I know you think I did something illegal, but I promise this story is much more than that!

I have a neighbor, Juanita! Now, don’t get me wrong…I don’t know her super well, but I know a few things about her! She’s just not a pretty face! She’s the type of person you’d see at a birthday party with a giant slice of cake on her plate, and if you ask why she didn’t just go back for a second slice, she’ll say it IS her second slice! Just greedy and big! You know what they say…bigger IS the best…but ONLY in the chest!

Anyways, for the past week, I’ve seen out my window that Juanita was checking her mailbox probably 10 times a day! I was wondering if she was expecting something important! I wondered if it was something I’d like to have myself! I bet you think I’m jealous! Nah! I was just curious!

Curiosity got the best of me, because what d’cha know, I saw Juanita leave her house, and then the mail girl came by not even 5 minutes later! And I knew for sure it was the special thing Juanita was expecting so expectingly because, well actually I didn’t but I did once I opened it! Yes I opened her mail! I walked right up outside my house, walked up along my driveway, walked up along the sidewalk, walked up to her mailbox, opened up her mailbox, closed up the mailbox, opened up the mailbox, took up out the package, closed up the mailbox, walked away up from her mailbox, walked up along the sidewalk, walked back up through my driveway, and walked back up into my house!

I opened the box, and you’ll never guess what it was! You’ll also never know what it was because I’m not telling you! All you need to know is that it was worth money! I bet her boyfriend bought it for her! Actually, I don’t bet that, I know that! There was a gift receipt! And the price was more money than you’ve ever seen! Ka-ching!

IDK how to explain it, but…have you ever gotten a gift where you’re just like “I’m keeping you forever!” It looked perfect! I then tried to slide it on my ring finger, and that’s when disaster struck! It didn’t fit! It was too loose and fell off immediately! COME ON!

I decided to return the package because I had no use for it! Juanita’s boyfriend was home, and I said it somehow wound up in my house! But he asked why the package was already open! I said I had nothing to do with it! Just then, Juanita arrived home! The boyfriend hadn’t taken the package from me yet, so I decided to just give it to Juanita myself! He was begging me not to and said it’d ruin everything, but I ignored him!

Juanita saw me holding the ring and said to her boyfriend, “Wait, this is the special thing you bought for me?! Were you gonna propose?!” Apparently, her boyfriend’s plan was for Juanita to get the package, open it herself, and receive the engagement ring as a proposal with no other context! What a WEIRD proposal idea, and I’m kinda glad I ruined it! But in my defense, I’d thought they were already married! What kind of couple lives together before marriage! Disgusting! AITA!