Can I be forced to go to court in person with my abusive ex? (ENGLAND small claims)

I’m being dragged through small claims court by my abusive ex over made-up claims — they say I have their belongings, which I absolutely do not. We were in a very toxic and abusive relationship. I won’t go into a long story, but there were threats of violence toward me and my toddler, among other things, and I have an open criminal case against them for assault and revenge porn.

So far, we’ve had two video hearings that didn’t go anywhere because my ex has failed to provide any evidence. Meanwhile, I’ve spent money (over £20) sending off my defence with signed tracked delivery to both the court and my ex. My ex claimed in court they only received one piece of paper. I was too scared to speak up and point out the postage weight matching what the court received. At the time the judge was also saying she didn’t receive anything from me either despite her admittedly having my postage evidence and a picture of it with the clerk and their signature in front of her!!!!! She was actually quite dismissive and rude. This just caused me to shut down and at that point I couldn’t speak anymore. Hearing my exes voice made it worse as I could hear they enjoyed the situation. I sent an email after court detailing the weights and pointing out perjury but that part was ignored. I was told my evidence was found after and given apologies from the court.

My ex is also playing games — like sending me an empty envelope by recorded delivery, possibly to pretend they’ve followed court procedure. I’ve emailed the courts about this manipulation but nothing seems to happen. The judge at the last hearing was clearly frustrated this was dragging on and has now demanded that the next hearing be in person. The envelope was also sent well outside of the times allocated to send documents. I am feeling harassed.

Here’s the issue: I suffer from severe mental health and mobility issues due to years of abuse (from this person and others). I receive therapy, medication, and PIP. I don’t leave the house unless absolutely necessary. I’ve had panic attacks in public from things like a smell of cologne — it’s that severe. I’m also currently trying to get a restraining order, but progress is slow. The lead detective handling my criminal case hasn’t responded to my last email and I’m not well enough yet to go in person.

Can I be forced to attend court in person despite all of this? Is there anything I can do to avoid facing my abuser physically in court for a small claims case that seems to be built on lies?

I do not want to have to bear my personal life in front of my abusive ex. I felt I was asked quite personal questions by the judge in front of my ex over the video hearing which I didn’t answer. If my ex knew i got my pip and things they would call up and sabotage my claim. similar threats were made about my universal credit i get for my toddler so i know it will happen. just to clarify - im not doing anything that I shouldn’t be, its just a long and invasive process to disprove malicious claims made against you. Your payments may also be stopped in the meantime. We would be homeless in that case. I have way too much on the line over what is a joke amongst friends to my ex.

I did email court and the response was “the Judge said you can bring a friend” I wish it was that simple. If anything I want my dignity. I will not be able to face my abuser in court and that will show itself in a horrible form. They don’t deserve the satisfaction of seeing me like that ever again.

Sorry for the waffling I’m pretty anxious. Thanks for reading if you got this far!!