Anxiety, social anxiety, low self esteem

I am a 26 y/o male, I have been dealing with these problems since I’ve been in middle school and they’re slowly getting worse. I have some trauma as my dad passed when I was 15 months old and had a verbally abusive mother, but I don’t blame her as she was constantly stressed being a single mom. I constantly compare myself to others and ask myself why’s it so easy for them to be themselves. I have tried every med under the sun, different therapies, and am lost. I am more successful than most people my age, good looking and fit, and have a beautiful girlfriend. I can’t figure out why I feel this way but everyday is an absolute grind. I feel like I can’t improve at work or am too scared to be confident in myself at work. I’m scared I’m going to lose my girlfriend, cause let’s be honest, a girl wants a confident man. I’m at a loss, I’m looking into any option that’s helped you