Scorpio bf and disagreements

Hello, first of all (throwaway account) I come in peace as a Pisces F having a bit of trouble with my Scorpio M bf who I very much love. I want to move in with him eventually and hopefully, but I'm struggling with when we have a disagreement whether it's something I should see as a real problem or accept that we will grow with each other and become stronger... Caveat here too in that he does a lot of lovely things for me that I appreciate and he has been increasingly thoughtful and working on it. Our chemistry is incredible and physically we're a perfect match.

Whenever we argue or have a disagreement, he always wants to say something inflammatory or he gets really defensive e.g. 'Well just go home then', or 'let's not be in a relationship then/maybe we shouldn't do this'. He's also resorted to a lot of i.e. 'you're just too sensitive', 'you're upset for no reason', 'you're making a big thing out of nothing' or says what I say to him back at me saying YOU actually do X. In comparison I really don't want anything to blow up and try and come at it calmly and empathetically seeing both our perspectives, and I've tried to teach him how to empathetically listen and respond, so the way he responds really worries me and doesn't make me feel secure about the future.

He also cools off after his initial explosion quite quickly and is apologetic. He's reviewed how he's spoken to me on text in an argument and agreed he was out of order and excessive and that's why he has improved not saying things when he's heated as I've explained I won't keep taking it, but his reactions are always extreme and he tells me he still thinks them but doesn't say it. It makes me feel like we're always on a knife edge. He's good at communicating about arguments and how we feel afterwards directly with me which I much prefer.

I'm not sure if this is Scorpio specific and that he might be able to mellow or learn to be a bit more emotionally regulated/emotionally mature in arguments in the future, or if I'm kidding myself a bit and maybe we're not the best match? I'm very forgiving and try to be as compassionate as possible but it can keep me in relationships longer than I should be so I feel I question things a lot more now.

TLDR; My boyfriend reacts defensively and aggressively in arguments and it makes me feel like we're on a knife's edge all the time. Is this something we can work on or a mismatch?

Any advice is much appreciated :)