Just a vent

maybe i’m crazy but i really don’t feel like it’s normal to be praised for doing sexual acts when i’m not in the mood. “i knew you weren’t in the mood but i appreciated that you let me do that.” we’ve had conversations before where he has stated women should have sex or perform certain acts even when they’re not in the mood to keep the relationship healthy. i was crying as it was happening but i hid it from him. he’s been on me about how i make him feel like i don’t wanna be here when we go days/a week without having sex so i’m starting to just do stuff even when i really don’t want to just to save the argument. but it’s never enough. when i’m not having enough sex with him,that’s a problem. when i am having enough sex with him,i don’t complement him enough. when im doing both of those things enough,i’m always lacking somewhere else. he always asks me if im happy even when i think he knows im not. even earlier this evening he was like “i ruined your life i don’t know why you’re here.” i feel like im barely hanging on