You Left, but He was Gone.

You left as though I grabbed your hand,

Dragged you helpless into our entry hall

through our black painted front door

Then shoved you down those three brick stairs,

And slammed the door with its funeral face

looking down at pitiful you

Sobbing for your loss.

___________________

And yet, you walked out our door

all on your own,

Everything packed for your sparkling new home;

That door didn’t slam

but slowly creaked to a partial close,

For days i sat by the window,

Holding my knees

Wiping my eyes to paint

flowers upon that dusty glass pain.

Knowing you weren’t coming back

least of all for me.

________________________________

You left as though I had two strong feet

to carry me

Into a future solemn and dark without your guiding company;

I kissed your face,

I whispered that you could leave,

Only to spare you the pain of having

to leave me on your own,

to leave me so shattered and alone.

I caressed your ears then your closed eyes,

Then screamed; wailing, I cried for the first time.

_________________________________________

You left as though I was diseased with an

illness highly contagious and chronic:

Disfiguring with permanent crucifying pain.

You took our furniture,

Took every pretty thing,

avoiding my gaze

ignoring me watching

as you dismantled my family and last home.

You carried on without a care

walking over pieces of me

lying in splinters across polished hardwood;

The glue didn’t hold,

Bonding as weakly as our last name,

When you chose mine,

did it remind you of the worst parts

of you

Why did you dress me

in the old clothes you hated?

_________________________

You left me so suddenly,

With your last breath

A knife struck my chest

Where it remains

Lodged above my ninth rib

The blade pierced my heart,

and I feel it with every beat

feel it so gladly,

you with me always:

For to remove it

is our reuniting.

__________________________________

You left as though I forced you violently,

You left and placed the blame upon me,

you left as though I can carry a mountain

and stand tall, shoulders back, poised in my suffering.

You left and I learned

I’d lost my home, my family

When my beloved died

in my arms,

And a father watched his daughter

Scream then shatter.

1. https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1lbcs62/comment/mxt7nv0/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

2. https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1law6yv/comment/mxpu9sy/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button