Trigger warning: do not read this post of you are not doing well

27 F, I have given 6 years to upsc, this year I appeared for interview of capf and prelims, couldn't qualify either one of them, result of capf came as a shock to me, felt devastated as it was my last attempt for this, I almost hang myself to ceiling fan. Somehow it felt wrong and I took a step back, my throat still hurts and I feel like doing this again and to end my life. I have nowhere to go now, feel directionless, if anybody has any idea to deal with this please help me out.