Why are my parents like this?

Okay, to start off I’m a (16F). This is gonna be really long so whomever sits and reads it thank you.

I don’t have a lot of friends, just a boyfriend and my close immediate family members. Recently me and my boyfriend (16M) have been growing closer, and decided after 6 1/2 months of just small make out sessions to take that step into having sex. My mom (both my parents are very religious) and I have a pretty open relationship I tell her quite a lot, and I told her when I was 13 I would tell her when I had sex (this was before I even had my first kiss) my first kiss came around and she basically turned it into a huge thing of discipline. Well after me and my boyfriend had sex I waited a couple of weeks to tell my mom, as I was wrapping my head around what happened I wasn’t ready for her overreaction. One night her and her friend sat down with me and her friend asked me for a condom cause her and her husband wanted to have sex. It almost baffled me that I would be asked that, and so I went and grabbed one telling them I got it from a friend. My mom looked at me dead in the eyes and asked if I was a virgin me not really great at lying looked away, she knew immediately I wasn’t and was mortified. Once her friend left with the condom my mom began to lecture me on how I was in the wrong for telling her in front of her friend, and that she was so disappointed. Her main focus though was that she was the last to know. She kind of kept saying like I needed to be guilty for all of it. I straight up told her she will not make me feel guilty for this. No woman or man should be shamed for their sexuality. She frankly walked out frustrated. Later into the night we all sat around with my parents friends and my dad began talking abt sex. (Why my parents feel the need to talk abt their sex life is beyond me) and I as their child was like ew gross. As any one would be. My dad was like don’t fucking talk virgin mary. Alarms went blaring! I was like oh and got up and made my way to my room and went to take a shower, my mom walked in and I was like why would you tell him this. This wasn’t a conversation that anyone should share, she told me she didn’t tell him, he supposedly was listening to our conversation the whole time. I was frustrated so I called it a night and went to bed, after laying there talking to my boyfriend my dad walked in. He began to tell me that I was stupid for having sex. (He was having sex the same age and my mom was doing it when she was younger then me but because they didn’t know Jesus that’s their excuse) He turned it into a huge lesson on how God is going to be so disappointed in me and how i will have to sit at Gods feet weeping telling him I fucked up. His words. I shook my head in disbelief. A few days later I spent the day binge watching a TV series and I walked out to have dinner. My mom asked abt my boyfriend and then once again began lecturing, my mom started off calm telling me that she doesn’t think I did it for a good reason and that I did it because I just wanted to get it done and over with, my response was that I did it because I love my boyfriend, I’ve never had so much love for someone in my life. She was like that’s a calculated answer. My dad started huffing and puffing things under his breath. How i don’t know what love is. And soon it became a yelling fit from my dad my dad told me how he’s not my person that I need to admit that i fucked up and I’m pushing limits with them. They told me I wasn’t aloud to see him unless we were in public. I shut down in which I do always, getting ridiculed and lectured for something has been a normal thing for me. They ended up yelling at me abt it until I left sobbing and shaking. I went to my room and cried to my boyfriend for a little while after, my mom shortly after went to tell her friends all the things that I did all the things that I’m such a bad kid for and how I lost my virginity how I can’t admit that I did something wrong. (I don’t think did anything wrong) Mind you they do this every time I do a thing wrong they tell the world anyone who’s willing to listen and tell them abt how horrible I can be how much I push limits. Days before they were saying how responsible I am, I get A’s, and go to a college for high school, I have a job, I don’t go out unless it’s once a month to see my boyfriend. But they began to tell me that I was turning the whole situation around on them saying I was playing the victim, I hadn’t said anything claiming to be the victim. My boyfriend and his parents expressed a fear of how my parents have a problem with control with just me not my brother. They don’t want to let go of me at all. They told me they won’t be paying for any sort of college or anything if I don’t call them every single day once I move out, I have a set date I’m aloud to get married, and a set age I’m aloud to have children. They shower me in materialistic items but only if I follow their rules until I’m thirty five if I do anything including get a tattoo without their permission, ride a motorcycle without permission, live with a man without their permission, travel without their permission, basically anything without their permission I will no longer have any sort of help or support. which I know i’m lucky I even get things but at the cost of not being able to be an adult to be my own person.

There’s so much more but I don’t even know what to start and when to end. Can someone help with what to do, and why this is happening?