[1018] Spit - first foray into magical realism!

Hi guys! Lovely to meet you all. I'd love some feedback on this piece. It's not complete yet, which is why it ends rather suddenly (lol). The main thing I want to know is - is it boring??

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1pWigCf5CuxP6oAUtu01cDLy011_P6hlr8dosmS1bq1s/edit?tab=t.0

Critiques: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1l6xbrp/1268_lattice_of_lives_chapter_2/ ; https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1l98nhd/1200_a_relationship/