I’m stuck in my job.

I work part time cashiering at a retail pet chain. The job itself is nice, but the environment is cheeks.

I remember when I first got hired, the first six months of doing my best and being praised for it. I was doing a stellar job! I didn’t miss a beat. I did my best and it felt great.

Then , they kept wanting more. Conversions and sales metrics were out of my control. Despite good performance on all the operations, not enough customers could be fucked to sign up for an account and we both felt uncomfortable when I tried pushing them to do so. I don’t mind stepping out of my comfort zone, but not at the expense of others.

I watch other coworkers talk endlessly, force our rewards and app system upon people, and pull endless amounts of disingenuous bullshit out of their ass to make the sale.

I can’t be bothered to do it. Sure, that’s a me problem. Ultimately I’m here to make sure the customers are comfortable, not the company, and that’s keeping me down. Sure, our app might save you ten bucks. I’m not going to force you to sign up if you don’t want to. I’m not going to pretend to be your friend to convince you to sign up, because we all know it isn’t real and that’s disgusting.

I -could- push the entire sales pitch on tired customers that just want to buy their dog food and be done with it. But it wouldn’t be me. Honestly? If I were on the receiving end of half the shit my coworkers spew out and tell me to do I would just go shop somewhere else.

I made the mistake of vocalizing this during a monthly review and got dogged in my annual, minor mistakes were blown out of proportion by managers that couldn’t say what they were really thinking; they were mad I wouldn’t drink the koolaid. Used as an excuse to cover the lies they sold to hire me.

I can’t do anything right here any more, even if I am doing my best. I’m stuck at the register. There’s no upward movement, despite the fact I could excel at anything they throw at me.

They’d rather promote new guy Joe Schmedley , who despite costing the store in countless, MASSIVE mistakes , shills the conversions like no other and loves the taste of their koolaid. And now he thinks he can micro manage me despite the fact i’ve been doing this twice as long. I could go on a whole separate tirade about the smarmy, two-faced clique that is management here. Fake as all hell.

So I just stopped trying. Management clearly doesn’t care. I’m just a warm body to cover their closing shifts. I still make the customers smile and make sure they have a good day. I always have a good day at work despite the constant attempts at nitpicking micromanagement. I do what’s needed to stop things from falling apart but that’s it. Nothing else. Nothing extra. They don’t pay me for that. If the managers want to keep me down they can deal with the rest themselves, even though I offer to help and do more, why should I do more than the bare minimum if I’m not compensated for it?

It just feels like wasted time. I sit there being bored listening to a podcast all day.

Over the last six months I went through and graduated EMT school to get my certification , honestly thanks to the fact that I can just sit and get paid to study by listening to my textbook on the clock.

Sure it’s nice to do nothing, but it’s nothing. I need something else. I hope I can get a job with my certification soon because I’m losing my mind here. It’s just wasted potential. I can’t be fucked to try for these people that are just going to take advantage of me and hold me down to get what they want. it’s disgusting.

People are what really matter to me, not inane metrics that serve to please no one but shareholders.