I’m being a terrible partner

Basically me and my partner had a giant argument and I ended the conversation with “I’m gonna find that fucking razor and tear apart my arms” and I really was gonna but I have since changed my mind. Every message he’s sent after is about how bad HE would feel if I relapsed. He’s literally made my entire relapse about himself like omfg. I’m actually tweaking and I think just for all those messages about himself I’m not gonna respond til morning to tell him I didn’t do anything.(also a few days ago I caught him sexting with ai soo don’t feel too bad for him)