(18f) self-spanking

I, (18f) have been feeling really guilty about my choices lately. I really want to be spanked but unfortunately don’t have access to someone who will do it. Instead, i’m looking to give myself a punishment that will teach me a lesson. I’m posting this both to get guidance on self spanking, receive advice on what level of punishment i deserve, and embarrass myself.

as for why i deserve this. there’s a few reasons. lately ive been really good about keeping clean, working out, and getting my work done - however, i started vaping and smoking again and have been masturbating a lot. I feel really dirty and guilty and it’s become a really reoccurring thing.

I have (rather unsuccessfully) spanked myself in the past and prefer to use a spoon and phone charger. I also have a brush and belt available.

If anyone has advice on self spanking and how to make it effective that would be much appreciated. I tend to not hit as hard as and i hold back or don’t hit enough to learn my lesson. i could also used a detailed punishment (position, number of strokes, tool) and wouldn’t mind if it included grounding, body writing, shaming, corner time etc.

thank you for the help (: