I don’t want to be ok

I know I’m not handling my mom’s passing very well. I think about it all day, every day. I’m about six weeks out from her passing, so it’s still fresh.

The hospice bereavement people have reached out about talking to someone a couple of times. I know I probably should get some type of therapy…but at the same time, I don’t actually want to be OK. I don’t want to move on. I don’t want to forget my mom. She was my favorite person on the planet. She got sick and died. I don’t know how I can ever feel good about being normal after that.

Does anyone else feel the same way?