r/AITAH•
QueenKwake

AITAH for asking my boyfriend to not go on his overseas trip?

Advice Needed

I (24F) don't want my boyfriend (23M) to go on his big overseas trip next year, because the dates are during a big festival in my hometown. We have been together for almost 2 years and my BF has been going on these trips for the past 4 years through a company online with a big group of people. This year his trip was during the festival in my hometown, but we didn't know that until 2 months before his trip, so I wasn't mad about something we couldn't change.

When it comes to his trip next year though, I asked him to look up the dates and they happen to be during this festival. The festival in question is one that I have been going to every year for as long as I can remember and I've always gone every year. Now that I have him in my life, I really want him to come with me and enjoy this festival with me and my friends every year, because it is such a big part of my life and I can't imagine him not being at it with me.

I understand that he really loves these trips that he goes on so I tried to compromise with him. I've told him that he could go on a trip during later dates, or to even go on a trip in the states, where it would be a lot cheaper. I have also been trying to convince him to take cheaper trips as is, since were still young and just getting started in life and don't have an excess of money. I'm trying to think about our future together and I would like to wait until we have extra money to spend for him to go on these trip, especially since he's the breadwinner between us.

He's still talking like he's going to go on the trip next year and I don't think he understands how important this festival is to me. I understand that these trips are also very important to him, but I would just want him to go on dates that work around the weekend of this festival. It doesn't seem like he likes any of the compromises I've given him and I don't know what else to do. So am I the asshole for not wanting him to go on this trip? Any advice would be greatly appreciate

Posted Jun 30, 2025, 3:14 AM UTC

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