Just some book recommendations that I never see here.

Having spent a fair bit of time in this sub, I see the same dozen or so books recommended over and over again, probably because this sub is riddled with bots referencing the top ten books in the self help sphere.

So here's a very short list of books I've found very helpful that I don't see here. I also searched them and didn't see any posts about them, aside from a stray comment or two for the last one. I'm not really here to summarize them because I think any book worth reading can't be condensed down into a few useful tips. Go and read them! Rather I'll just highlight how I think it differs from the usual slop you see hocked on here.

1. Where ever you go there you are by Jon Kabet-Zinn

What a lot of books recommended here lack is an evidence based methodology. Most are anecdotal AT BEST. Kabet-Zinn is the man responsible for bringing meditation into clinical practice in the West, and has the research to support MBSR use broadly for benefits ranging from relief from chronic pain to increased focus and cognitive benefits. There is so much research around meditation and so little around things like... cold showers and yet so much time is spent in this sub convincing us we need to do the later and meditation is only brought up as one step in a lengthy morning routine, usually paired with some other task to make it seem more productive.

2. Shambhala: the Sacred Path of the Warrior by Chogyam Trungpa.

So normally I find it incredibly cringe when people use the word warrior in a self improvement context, because no, Brad, you aren't waging psychological warfare with the coworker in the cubicle next to you just because he interrupts you in meetings. But warrior is used here in absence of a better translation for the Tibetan word. It might seem contradictory to criticize self help gurus who appropriate eastern religion after I just recommended Kabet Zinn, but he took the core of the practice and stripped it of it's spiritual context, where as many snake oil salesmen use superficial aspects of eastern culture to sell what is ultimately a very Western product. Anyways Trungpa is a great way to return mindfullness back to it's spiritual context without fully converting to Buddhism.

3. Keeping House While Drowning by KC Davis

I think this book has a lot more to offer than just some house keeping tips, but she does give a lot of very specific and practical suggestions. It's a great example of how to improve through kindness to yourself. I know this place tends to lean on negative reinforcement (it is called get disciplined I suppose) but self compassion has been shown to be way more effective. I also think this book does a great job at teaching you how to approach self help advice. Not everything is optimal for everyone, stop taking advice that clearly isn't working for you. Don't be afraid to make modifications to people's advice to fit your experience.

And that's it. As a bonus I suggest listening to the If Books Could Kill Podcast, where they cover a lot of the books normally recommended here (Atomic Habits, 4 Hour Week, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck) I'm in no way affiliated with it, it's free, and no I'm not selling an app that will summarize these points.