My dog

My dog escaped- I found him on my way home.

I found your beer in your bag that you said you didn't drink.

I searched your phone pretty hard.

Julie Daniels your new fb friend who the fuck is that?

Do you not really care?

I left at dinner. Did you feed our children? Have you ever fed them? 400 in groceries... did you feed them while I call my family that I miss so badly living here with you?

It's not much fun since I quit drinking but it's even less since drinking tonight. I talked to my aunts- they're well. Me-not so much. Wondering, Lonely Ha you used to write me as a teen... so poorly written- begging for a country girl and as Soon As You Got Her You revealed yourself. I want to go home. I fucking hate skibbidy toilet Ohio.

Did you feed our children after letting my dog out and not knowing he is gone? Did you know I am drunk on the beer you said you didn't buy?

Where is the Walmart receipt? I have looked... please if there is someone else please tell me so I can unbuckle and get off this boring ride.

Can you make a playlist of songs over the 20 years you say you've loved me? Songs that will resonate with me and make me believe you?

Or a letter describing the way I taste The burn you had when seeing me cut the fucking bush in your yard today? I wore makeup and blow dried my hair

I'm invisible to you even when rebelling. This is something new. Not exciting but new. The ac and quiet in the van is nice - thank you for gas and payments and "watching" the kids.

I wanted a lot more than this.

You acted like you couldn't LIVE without me but I am nothing l-no gratitude-no kisses This time not even bitching that I'm drinking

Maybe I like this. Maybe this is adulthood! Finding my damn dog running down the road and hopefully my kids have eaten- if they haven't I'll be slowly robbing you to death so I can go home.

This is my promise to myself.

I don't even care that the only two pictures you sent me this weekend involved long legged, tanned skinny women's legs and you were drinking with them- in fact- go for it! Why not spend 1000 dollars for baseball for the whole teams parents to get drunk! That's Ohio! They're all drunk and miserable. At least in Kentucky we remember eachother on the hangover day.

Ugh u suck and I can't leave you jump on the hood of the car and take my keys and purse and sling me around it is nothing new but something that I was used to... but now ah maybe this is manageable.... since someone new has you- couldn't find her on your phone lucky for you she's homegrown