#24

Today's been a rough day emotionally as a day I watch my dad by this last breath in the morning my sister woke me up I was sleeping next to his bed because she HAD to stay. It's really hard letting go with somebody that's always been there I miss him a lot I feel so torn but I'm glad I'm alone right now I don't have anyone I'm taking care of is making me feel like shit for caring about them someone who's making me question the idea that I can even love somebody I think those exes ever realized but they were actually saying to me, what they were denying and how they made me feel kind of made the whole dehumanization and grief that comes from your dad who raped you and replaced you and abandoned you feel that much sweeter